This is a list which was given to us by friends. The original applied to people who have lived in various less affluent countries. We amended it a bit to relate to our experiences while living in Mexico for six years.
- You cannot answer the question, “Where do you live?”
- The vast majority of your clothes were in style fifty years ago.
- You speak two languages, but cannot spell in either.
- You forget common English words.
- You read National Geographic and recognize someone.
- You do not know who Pokemon is.
- You have a time-zone map next to your telephone.
- You look on all food with suspicion.
- You consider a city 500 km away to be “very close.”
- You watch nature documentaries and recognize the local menu favorite.
- You can cut grass with a machete, but you cannot start a lawn mower.
- You speak with authority on every mode of transportation.
- You read the international section of the newspaper before the comics.
- You marvel that tap water is drinkable.
- After travelling more than 10 km., you look for a military checkpoint.
- You make out your grocery list in another language.
- You sort your friends by continent.
- You “vacation” in your passport country.
- You wince when people mispronounce foreign words.
- Using two languages and charades is a standard means of communication.
- The majority of your friends do not speak English.
- Someone mentions the name of a team and you name the sport wrong.
- You look for mariachis to perform on special days.
- You never take anything for granted.
- You watch the news from a foreign country, and you know what the nationals are REALLY saying.
- You know how to pack – and fast.
- Fitting fifteen or more people into a car seems normal to you.
- You refer to gravel roads as highways.
- You haggle with the checkout clerk for a lower price.
- You become upset when people do not finish their food, or worse yet, throw it into the trash.
- A two-hour wait in a line is normal to you.
- You are sure something is missing if you receive a document in less than a month, four trips, and ten copies – in triplicate.
- You think nothing of straddling white lines to pass between trucks or buses, with a full 15 cm. clearance.
- You think that an even haircut is accidental.
- You forget what the yellow lines on the road mean and become quite indignant when a “ticket” jogs your memory.
- You cannot hand a policeman a dollar and drive off when he stops you.
- You feel odd at being in the ethnic majority.
- You feel the need to go to a Mexican restaurant just to listen to the conversation.
- You have to have five hot sauces on your food.
- You marvel when people are “on-time” because “on-time” to you means anything within a two-hour range – in either direction.
- You marvel that gas stations have toilet seats AND toilet paper.
- Walking in the street, rather than on the sidewalk, seems normal to you.
- You cannot grasp the fact that you can buy almost everything in one store.
- You have a name in at least two languages, and they are not the same.
- You miss the sub-titles when you see a movie.
- In stores, you feel overwhelmed when faced with choices.
- You realize you have lived too long in a place when YOU start staring at the tourists.
- You think a “foreign” school teaches English.
- You refuse to believe that the food is fresh if you have not seen it killed or dug up before your eyes.
- You try to enter a military base by showing only your passport.